happy as i am

Thank you to everyone who caught my grumpy arsed post from last night. I did have a good evening in the end, i cooked dinner in a strop still but then we made up (had a good bitch about work) before I went out to see my mum.

Re the Japanese? When I came home I tried to switch off the laptop but pressed some stupid buttons, and hubby read the beginning of my post over my arm. He hadn't realised how much he'd upset me, apologised lots and agreed to come with me if 'I really wanted to go'.

Result! Venting on here really does work!

The rest of my evening was nice. I took a bottle of wine and a box of chocolates up to my mums, it was Tibetan New Year and she's been quite lonely since my sis has been in hospital.

We chatted a fair bit, and then I slung on a DVD, Juno and we watched it whilst sharing a bottle of wine, the chocs and various other sweet treats. The film was alright, nothing special and I was glad I'd watched it with mum rather than hubby. It was good to spend time with my mum and I need to remember to do it more often.

Hubby watched Outlaw whilst I was out, which he said I wouldnt have enjoyed it, so two films being returned to Lovefilm today. Whilst I was walking home me and hubby had a text conversation - it was a shock coz he never normally replies to my texts but in the space of 20 minutes I got 3 replies!

I'm taking tomorrow off even though I don't feel so bad today. I need to take the time, coz these mood swings are partly from me being fed up with work and its unfair for me to expect hubby to take the brunt of it all the time. Tomorrow I might try to get a manicure. I need to go the gym and also return the clothes I bought my sis last weekend which she didn't like.

Right, best get on and ready for work.

Love to you all

well, listen to me moaning as always! my day/week got better. I went out to lunch with some friends, had a training course in the afternoon which made me laugh sooo much, and then caught up with my work. Mostly.

I'm not out for curry tonight, gonna cook a quick dinner then go visit my mum, I've got a film (Juno) a bottle of wine and a box of chocs so we will have a blast!

I've also booked Friday as holiday, but seeing as how I feel this afternoon I might unbook it, i hate wasting holiday if I've nothing to fill it, but I felt I needed it and now I don't.

I'm so fickle!

Have a great tail end of the week!

x

today i feel drained. my last post here was soooo happy. But this week I am really struggling with. I just feel low. I know I'll snap out of it soon but right now I just wanna crawl back into bed.

There's nothing new going on but its just this week seems harder, like walking through treacle and even thoughts of my holiday are failing to make me smile.

Ah well, another day, another dollar. Best get moving, I'll wake up soon enough.

Have a good day y'all.

hugs

x

Where do these weekend things disappear to? I will be back to work again tomorrow, and before I can blink Friday will be around again.

It's been a good weekend. Full but good. I've another lemon sponge cooling in the kitchen and another pile of dishes and housework to get done. Seems like life is far too short.

Still, looking forward to work tomorrow, I've a whole heap of new challenges. I actually have to make a start on all sorts of things this week that I've never done before. Eeek. Better to take a challenge than stagnate.

The old adage 'if you always do what you've always done, you'll always have what you've already got' reminds me that it is better to keep thinking forwards. Maybe not living for my next step but at least having a back-up plan in my head.

2008 was a damn good year for me (except for all the sister stuff) and I intend to make 2009 and every year thereafter better in some way.

Enjoy your week

Goodness, it's the weekend again. I can't believe how quickly time flies. I've been meaning to write up a post on here since Tuesday, but have only been on my other blog and trying to keep up with you guys.

Well, the sun is shining down on the South coast and it is almost warm enough to go out without a coat. I didn't get onto the net til now as I slept late (well til 9.30) and then we nipped into town.

We went along the sea front and the beach was sooo pretty. There were quite a few people out for a jog, and one brave family down using their beach hut already. I guess you gotta make hay while the sun shines!

Anyway, I have a busy day today so I'd best get on with my story telling instead of getting distracted. Ooops.

Today: I have a driving lesson at 2pm and am being dropped off at the hospital my sister is currently residing in, so this morning I went round the shops to buy her some clothes. Bless her, out of boredom and medication her pre-pubescent size 8-10 body has swollen to a shapely size 16, but she has mostly her old clothes. We did a visit week before last with a few things but she needs more. So I got her some nice stuff and some nail polish so I can do her nails too.

Driving lesson time I am gonna speak to my instructor and book a test! I only hope I'm near enough ready... I keep seeing cars and really really wanting one. Hubby has said due to our plans being up in the air I shouldnt spend more than £500 but I saw a T reg Nissan for £1450 which seems sooo affordable. I could get a 0% credit card and put it on that without batting an eyelid. (I'm used to my credit card debt being in the £1000's and always feel the need to splurge when it gets as low as a couple hundred pounds silly I know).

Anyway, after I see my sis, I have to get a taxi home and then bake a cake to take to my friends, we're going round for a birthday party and I've yet to wrap her pressies, despite having bought one before Xmas!

Aaaagh, wittering again. The rest of the week now:

On Monday evening hubby and I took our mums and bro-in-law out for curry. It was lovely to see everyone and everyone except me enjoyed their meals. It seems so much easier (if not cheaper) than cooking for 5 totally different tastebuds. Hubby likes his curry HOT, my mum likes it vegetarian or with prawns, MIL likes hers mild and Bro likes it with veggys and quite hot. I always havr lamb. Anyway, we had a pleasant evening and got dropped home by Bro.

Tuesday night I had a driving lesson and then hubby and I relaxed in front of the DVD/TV watching 2 Episodes of Terminator - Sarah Connor - back to back.

Wednesday I worked a bit later (only til 5.30 mind) and then went to the gym. On my return we had quorn/beef chilli.

Thursday night we snuggled in and watched some of Season 4 of The Wire (which just keeps getting better!) and I cooked chicken peas and rice. Yum.

Last night I went out with some ladies, hubbys mum and cousin and a couple of her friends. We went to a lovely Greek restaurant and had such fun. We had 3 bottles of wine between 5 of us, and we shared two lots of Meze platters. I've never seen so much food. We tried most stuff and all left totally and utterly stuffed. Luckily I got a lift home so didn't have to get the train, and I was fast asleep before midnight.

Phew! What a week. Work was nothing but a blur in the midst of it. The new job (to date) is working out nicely, I am loving the variety and challenge so that's me.

I hope you are all well, I've tried to graze on your blogs and keep upto date but I'm failing miserably. Ah well, we've nothing on next week except a driving lesson so I'll definitely be on more then.

Enjoy the sunshine and your weekend!

Happy
x

ps - my sis is doing ok but will be in hospital for some time as they need to ensure she keeps improving and the meds she is on are the right ones for her.

Tis all a load of tosh to me. Those money-grabbing card companies, florists and the like love it, but I refuse to get sucked into the hype.

Thankfully I have myself a good and like minded man, and we are firm believers that love and presents should occur throughout the year. Why have one 'special' day?

However, I did bow down to the pressure, i went to W'rose last night after a pint at the pub and looked at all the heart shaped tat. And then I went to the alcohol aisle and picked out a couple of aptly named bottles of beer instead.

So, hubby has tonight had a bottle of 'bitter and twisted' which I chose because his work is currently making him that way. Tomorrow night there is a bottle of 'Liberation' which was me hoping he would feel chilled out after drinking both bottles...

Today has been spent together, as we do most weekends, we've snuggled up on the sofa a lot, I made him lunch and he made me dinner. Sadly I had to defrost the fridge and freezer as there was a huge lump of ice in the bottom but we were in the kitchen chatting together...

and then after dinner I baked a lemon drizzle cake, and my fruit cake (pound cake with a few adaptations) is in the oven now. This damn cake takes TWO HOURS in the oven. Don't think it'll be made again. It was my healthy option - glace cherries, dried fruit and ground almonds in with flour, sugar, eggs, margarine, a tot of brandy and some mixed spices.

So, we have also watched a fair bit of tv together, well I say tv, i mean dvd's. We started on season 4 of The Wire, that is such a good series, and watched two episodes of Terminator - The Sarah Connor Chronicles, not sure if I'm into it, but it's from my subscription.

Have a good night if you are celebrating tonight,

see ya later

And the sun shines! Yippeee!

I don't know what to do with myself. I know there are a zillion things I could and indeed SHOULD be doing, but I'll be damned if I can be bothered to do dull things.

So far we stayed in bed late talking I am (obviously) here and hubby is just next to me with a good book. We have some easy music playing and i feel sooo chilled. In fact I am freezing cold. Yuk. Must have a shower and get dressed before my fingers and toes drop off.

My stoopid driving instructor has messed up my day, he text late last night to say my lesson is at 12.15 (i thought I'd asked for 2pm as usual) so it's slap bang in the middle of the day, and I can't decide whether to have a big breakfast or a big but late lunch. Hmmm. Bacon sarnies are calling, I even got a nice baguette from W'rose on the way home from the pub last night!

I keep meaning to do a spring clean - cupboards are a mess, fridge appears to be having a mental breakdown and leaking water... ooerr... we don't wanna buy a new one coz you can't buy the size we have any more, and to put a larger fridge (which we don't really need) in the same place would mean moving cupboards and all sorts...

On the good news front I only have £220 to pay on my credit card. For now! Sadly the balance of our hols will be split between deal for next month.

I'd like to bake a cake this weekend, and I should see about giving the lawn a trim, can i do that yet or is it too early? I want to do so much but I feel so lazy. I have only been to the gym twice this week, and I swear I can feel my belly swelling up to its larger size again.

Ah well. Nothing else planned for the weekend. Hope you all have a good one

x

I saw my sister today, her weight has rocketed due to her medication. Seeing her reminded me of two blessings really, so I'm cheating and putting two in one. But I reckon I can bend the rules a wee bit anyway as it's my game.

So, blessing number two?

           HAVING MY HEALTH

My sis was struggling with her weight, struggling to bend, struggling to find energy, struggling into her clothes. Yet she is bored stupid of being in hospital, the other patients are a lot older and she doesn't know how long she will be there.

Me on the other hand? Hardly ever ill. The odd bout of feeling depressed low, the one hospital entry for a bad asthma attack, and no other serious health issues that I know of. I have managed to get my weight down to sensible so I can bend down, run, breath and find energy.

I also have the choice of when I want to go out, what I want to eat, whilst many are restricted by circumstance or finance.

Blessing number 3?

BEING FINANCIALLY SAVVY

As a child I had just enough, but we had to make do and didn't have all the best stuff, but it gave me something of an understanding of what is affordable, what is a neccessity (or not), and at the moment although I'm still not minted if I want takeaway, or to go out for dinner, to buy myself new clothes, or even to go to the gym I know I have enough money to do so.

So, although I do enjoy the odd credit card burn I can still have enough each month to pay back a chunk of my debt and have a life. Kids these days though? my sis being a prime example, want everything that everyone else has, and expect the good life to fall into their laps. I'm sure there is some of todays 'youth' who appreciates the above values but you never seem to hear about these people, just the yobs and idiots who give the rest a bad name.

For these small blessings I am glad.

In these days of doom and economical gloom I am lucky that i have a lot to be grateful for. So, I intend to make a point of celebrating the simple but good things in my life at least once a week.

So, firstly, though in no particular order....

A NICE HOT BATH.

We had a new bath installed about two months ago (nearer 4), but have yet to do the tiling, so I haven't had the pleasure of a fully finished bathroom, but the new bath sure looks a lot better than the old. It is longer instead of being a corner one and makes the room look huge. I've also painted the walls and ceiling white so it feels spacious.

Tonight I decided to chill. Bubble bath. Check. Mug of coffee. Check. Good book. Check. CD an player. Check.

All the ingredients of a relaxing hour.

Unfortunately I have a bad habit of dozing off to sleep in the bath, so hubby stuck his head around the door periodically. Other than that? I was left to turn into a prune. My CD finished and I started to drain the bath, but my book got real good and soon I was sitting in stone cold water flicking pages quicker than I knew I could.

But. Over an hour later?

When I got out the water I was prune-ified AND very, very relaxed.

What a wonderful and cheap hours entertainment.

Good night

i borrowed hubbys ipod just to be differnt...

1. Put Your iTunes/Ipod/MP3 Player on shuffle
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. You must write down the name of the song no matter how silly it sounds!
4. Put any comments in brackets after the song name.
5. Tag at least 10 friends (i ignored this bit..)
6. Anyone tagged has to do the same, because fun pointlessness spreads like a virus (or not, so do as you wish..)

If someone says 'Is this okay?' what do you say?
She's got my love in her hand

How would you describe yourself?
(s)he's a bum

What do you like in a guy/girl?
small man big mouth

How do you feel today?
metal commmand

What is your life’s purpose?
i got ID

What's your motto?
Sway

What do your friends think of you?
New York Soul

What do you think of your parents?
Carved inside

What do you think about often?
crying and drifting blues

What is 2 + 2?
everywhere (i like this)

What do you think of your best friend?
Ballad of Jane

What do you think of the person you like?
the chosen legacy

What is your life story?
st anger

What do you want to be when you grow up?
blessed (awww sweet)

What do you think of when you see the person you like?
sufferers time

What will you dance to at your wedding?
born in the USA (lies)

What will they play at your funeral?
baby needs a new pair of shoes (gotta be smart dressed when I get where I'm going)

What is your hobby/interest?
Sarah Yelling

What is your biggest fear?
You wouldn't know

What is your biggest secret?
Flow

What do you think of your friends?
'Gator country

What do you think of your friends?
Kingdom

What will you post this as?
no more mr nice guy

This is mostly a jumble but never mind

1. I've come to realize that my last kiss... was yummy and stomach tingling soppy.

2. I am listening to... silence and the sound of the laptop whirring

3. I talk... absolute rubbish most of the time!

4. I love... my hubby

5. My best friend/s... never call

6. My first real kiss... was over-rated.

7. Love is... difficult to find

8. Marriage is... exactly the same as any other relationship - you have to work at it

9. Somewhere, someone is thinking... of baby names.

10. I'll always... be a control freak

11. The last time I really cried was because... I expected too much and got just enough.

12. My cell phone... is a waste of money.

13. When I wake up in the morning... I struggle to get out my bed.

14. Before I go to bed... I kiss my hubby goodnight.

15. Right now I am thinking about... never eating pizza again. At least not a whole Dominos medium one!

16. Babies are... cute mostly, unless they're ugli.

17. I get on Myspace... where's that then?

18. Today I... had a very long bath as a treat.

19. Tomorrow I will be... going to the gym to work of my pizza.

20. I really want to be... able to afford a larger house and work part time.

21. Someone that will most likely repost this is... everyone has already done this, so maybe nobody...

tee hee

x

was tiring. I can see all the work which I will be tackling in due course, but I am only actually dealing with a small portion, and even that is leaving me dazed.

Definitely interesting seeing the other side from what I used to deal with, but wow. The pressure is closing in already (mainly from my own expectations) - I did think about staying til 5.30pm tonight, but realised the screen was a blur of colours and shapes.

I don't know quite how I will stay afloat, but I intend NOT to sacrifice my life/work balance now that I have it just right. I need to make sure I get to the gym regularly, I reckon as the mornings get lighter it should be easier to do, but I am gonna (when my verucca is finally fixed) have to get changed at the leisure centre and forgo my early morning chats with hubby eventually. I'd rather go in early than watch everyone else leave whilst I work.

So, an interesting day, and as I have yet to reward myself for being moved/promoted/progressed (or whatever they did) I am taking hubby out for dinner. At least, just as soon as I've checked a few of you's blogs, I feel I am falling behind, and get myself washed and dressed.

Have a wonderful evening

x

wasn't too bad after all. I've got a lot to learn but I've had a good grounding the last 13 months. Hopefully I will be fine. Although I spoke to my old boss and she made some comment about how my old section was fine if I had kids and other priorities...

glad I didn't mention how broody I am.

Ha ha!

The last laugh will be on me

x