I'm starting to find this really difficult. It's been nearly a week, and although there are obvious 'improvements' in my sister she hasn't snapped back to being herself. I find it hard spending time with her. It worries me that I might go the same way sometime.

I had two shots of neat rum last night, the burning as it went down kinda helped, and I slept through the night. Don't worry, I know alcohol isnt the answer, but it helps from time to time.

I'd probably be fine if it was sunny, like yesterday, but it's raining, and I just want to hide away. Not sure I can face work, but then again I need to be kept busy, to stop my wandering thoughts.

My tears are coming. I'm not sure whether they're self pity, sadness for my sister or pent up frustration at life in general. I stopped the tears for now. Too mch to be doing.

See ya